research – Workplace Navigator

I finally checked off a bucket list item on Saturday. I finished my first half marathon. Whew. What a relief. I must say it wasn’t easy but the sense of accomplishment is amazing. I can remember when the goal first came out of my mouth. I was working with an amazing Coach named Stephen Starkey. We were working through a Brain Based Coaching process and I had to come up with three challenging goals to accomplish in 6 months. I had initially figured I’d set my goal as running 10 miles. Period. Stop. Mostly because I had run 10 miles before and I figured I could easily attain that goal. Then Steve said, “Is that challenging enough?” Whoa. I knew in my heart it wasn’t. It was a softball goal. So then I said “I want to run a half marathon”. What? Where in the world did that come from? I wanted to grab the words with my hands and put them back in my mouth. Did I mention I’m not a runner? I’m a really slow jogger and, at that point, I was lucky to run …er jog two miles at a time. It’s amazing how one coach and one question can prompt you to push yourself.

So it’s one thing to set the goal, it’s a whole other animal to actually finish; to cross the finish line. How many New Year’s resolutions have you not accomplished? Granted, there are folks out there with the stamina and chutzpa to just go run 13.1 miles without any training. God bless them all. But I’m over 50, not exactly svelte and it was going to take months of training to be able to survive the race and not leave it on a gurney. This part was definitely accomplished with the steadfast help of another amazing Coach, Travis Marsh. With his help, he kept me accountable to my goal and helped me plan out the action items to achieve it. Having a coach made the difference.

So what here are the steps to crossing the finish line:

1. Challenging. Go after something challenging. Go for the uncharted territory. If you are writing a blog, then write a book. If you have your Associate’s degree, then get your Bachelor’s. If you raised $500 for Cancer last year, raise $2,000 this year. If you’ve run a 5K, then sign up for a 10k. Push yourself. It definitely helps to have a coach asking you, “Is that challenging enough?” Go big or go home.

2. Google. Google or research best practices. This is invariably the first step for most of the clients I coach. Find an article on how to write a book. Research what school’s are the best for pottery making. See where the best areas are to go reef diving. Get a book on tango dancing. Figure out which half marathon works best for you based on location and your personal commitments. Invest in some research.

3. Plan. Plan the steps to get there. Within a few weeks of setting the goal, I had the strategies and some action steps already planned out. Travis helped me break it up into manageable chunks. I had my weekly long runs scheduled out all the way up to race day. If you have a goal that does not require planning, then go back to step one and start over. It’s not challenging enough.

4. Execute. This is where you are going to have to show up. I have run three times a week since I set the goal. Rain. Heat. Humidity. Darkness. Plan on adversity. As it turns out, the day of the race was overcast with drizzle, a temperature of 70 degrees and about 95% humidity. Not ideal running conditions. Although my mother figured I would call it off due to weather, I knew there was no way I was giving up on the goal. I found a rain poncho and took a plastic baggie for my phone. I had spent 5 months running and planning for this day. Adversity or not, I was going to show up!

5. Envision. In the four days that lead up to the race, I was constantly trying to squelch my fear. Fortunately, my son had sent me a YouTube link of Jimmy Valvano and the 1983 NC State Basketball team called “Survive and Advance”. One of the most incredible things in the video, is that Jimmy V would have the team practice cutting down the nets (which is what happens for the winning basketball team after a championship game) every year. Use an entire practice to cut down the nets. First, of course, he had set the challenging goal of winning a national championship, and then, he made sure the team was envisioning success. I started envisioning crossing the finish line, putting a 13.1 sticker on my car, and having the medal around my neck. Envision success.

6. Support. Make sure you have support. Whether it’s someone to underwrite your education, drive you to the soccer tournament or proof read your manuscript. I can assure you that if my husband had not been available to pick up a dozen Krispy Kreme’s after a 14 mile run or been there at mile 12 of the race to help encourage me to the finish, I might still have finished but his support made it easier. As well as the countless (I mean more than 100) people along the race route and in the race, who said “You’ve got this” or “Good job”, a high five or a thumbs up. It carried me to the end.

7. Do it. It’s going to take tenacity. My son has spent three years planning and working towards running track for an NCAA Division 1 team. He works out everyday. He applied to the schools that fit his criteria. He ultimately went to the school he had the best chance of making the team. He contacted (pestered) the coach. When he got to the University of Miami, he busted his hump at every practice. He made the team. His tenacity and work ethic paid off. Just do it.

Now I’m in the enviable position of being unfettered. I haven’t decided my next goal but I feel like anything is possible. So get out there and cross that finish line.

There is a hyper-delicate balance between rational and irrational fear. This is easily explained by example: there is the well-founded fear of standing-in-the-middle-of-a-field-with-an-umbrella-in-a-thunderstorm fear. On the flip side there is the fear that the cockroach skittering on the floor will somehow approach and harm you. I suffer from both. I am the biggest wuss in my house. Ask my kids. They will be happy to back this up.

In Galvin de Becker’s book, The Gift of Fear, the case is made that some fear is innate. Fear can save your life as he shows in an example in the book. The simple act of an attacker closing a window as he leaves his victim behind in the room and, intuitively, the victim realizes that if she doesn’t get out of there, she will be a murder victim. She does and lives to tell about it.

There is the completely neurotic fear that my dog, Baci, suffers from. She won’t step on a different surface. New hardwood, tile, slate or plywood. She will not step over it, onto it or around it. She is paralyzed. It seems so irrational but there must be something to this paralysis. Did she step onto some surface in her puppydom that caused this irrational fear?

So now what? How do you conquer fear?

1. Check First. Is this rational? What are you basing this on? Is the cockroach really going to attack you? When did you last read the headline – “Mother Killed By Palmetto Bug.” Think about this in relation to YOU – Would applying for that new position mean you would lose your current job? Nah. Face it, most decisions you make are not catastrophic. But investigating what your fear is based on is important; especially when it comes to your future in the workplace.

2. Research. I find that researching all available scenarios helps. If you are looking for a new job, maybe this means looking down avenues you would typically not consider. Maybe you would be willing to move or adding an extra 30 minutes to your commute. Maybe look at a different industry. Baci is constantly testing the waters; especially if there is a desirable tennis ball in the middle of the piece of plywood. Doing the research makes it easier for her to take the next step.

3. Test. Take a step. Go grab your slipper from the other room. At least you’ll be prepared to smack that cockroach. Call a friend you know in the industry you might want to move to and ask what opportunities are available. Baci starts by putting out a paw and then retreating. She’s testing her hypothesis. You are going to have to test the waters. Start writing the blog even if you don’t finish it in the first pass.

4. Scared. Sometimes you just have to do it scared. Actually, you frequently have to do it scared. My husband and I were watching the gymnastic trials for the Olympics last year. There was Danell Leyva on the high bar, flying high above the bar in some kind of back flip. I turned to Kevin and said, “So how do you try that the first time?” We laughed. But you have to. I can promise you Levya, was at least a little bit scared the first time he let go of that bar to launch himself 25 feet above the ground. You really don’t want to fail at that the first time out – watch it here. Do it scared.

5. Pathways. You are going to need to lay some new neural pathways. Charles Duhigg compares them to ruts in the mud. It’s really difficult to change ruts. The only way is to start working on it. This is extremely hard for me. Take a breath, regroup and lay down a new rut.

My dog Baci is amazing at this. First, she is paralyzed by the new hardwood floor in the dining room. She won’t set a paw on the floor. But her favorite window for squirrel hunting is only three feet away…across the new surface. She runs around to all the entrances to check that the new surface is everywhere. She looks at my husband to be assured that the new surface is safe. Sniffs. Tests it with her paw. Retreats. It may take an hour or three days, but eventually she is trotting up to her favorite spot staring out the window, standing proudly on the new hardwood floor. She’s laying new neural pathways.

How about you?