52 Weeks of Showing Up

On April 16, 2013September 17, 2016 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace Navigator2 Comments

This is it. I have been blogging weekly for one solid year. Woo hoo! I have to say that when I started this, I wasn’t sure it I could do it. As my husband can tell you, I am not a quitter. In fact, I’ve been described as tenacious (on more than one occasion) but I was very uncertain when I started this blog, 52 weeks ago. The biggest lesson I have learned is, that I just need to show up. Showing up does not mean being “perfect”. It means putting one foot in front of the other; even when you are tired. It means writing when only 5 people have subscribed. It’s when you would much rather sleep in or surf Facebook. Trust – Just show up.

As Seth Godin says ,”Don’t just start. Continue. Ship. Repeat.” I thought the hardest step was starting. I have found out that repeat is the hardest step. It’s so easy to say, “Well, maybe this should be a bi-weekly blog, maybe monthly…maybe quarterly”. We’ve all been there. The goal, finish line starts to slide or fade. Excuses flood your brain. The Inner Dictator takes over and tells you that your stuff is just no good anyway. Trust me; you can win the battle if you just show up.

Here are some tips to help keep you on track:

1. Preparation. If you want to run a marathon, put your running shoes by your bed the night before. If you want to cook at home more, make a shopping list for the week. If you want to write a weekly blog, have a list of ideas to pick and choose from and make sure you are reading or listening or scanning the environment for ideas for that list. If you only wait for inspiration, you’ll be waiting a long time. Preparation is critical to showing up.

2. Routine. I block off 30 minutes every Tuesday and Thursday morning to write. I can set my watch by devoted runners in my neighborhood. “Oh, there’s Mike and his friends on a Sunday morning; must be 9 AM. Or – It’s six o’clock, I better see what I’m making for dinner from the pile of recipes I selected on Saturday.” If you have a routine, your body and mind are on auto pilot. You don’t even think about it (and there is no time for the Inner Dictator to protest). Once you have established the routine; it’s so much easier to show up for yourself.

3. Messy. Embrace some messiness. It won’t be perfect. So just get over it. It doesn’t have to be perfect. I’m not enthralled with every post I wrote, but overall, I am proud of the blog. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. I am amazed that often, that the least “inspired” post gets tons of feedback. And the one I thought was a masterpiece, barely gets noticed. Sometimes, I think the post that is most from the heart has the best “legs” and the post that has been “primped, preened and edited to death” is ho-hum. Let it be messy; don’t be your own judge. Others will.

4. Neighbors. As in, quit worrying about your neighbors, and what they might say. As Eleanor Roosevelt said “You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” Worrying about acceptance will grip you with fear. Maybe only one person reads the post, and no one else does. That’s fine. I remember being shocked when I realized about two months ago that my site had been clicked on from 46 different countries. 46! Global. I had no idea. Who knew I had so many “neighbors”.

5. End in mind. My best writing is when I am talking to someone. An ex boss, a client, a friend or my child; when I’m trying to inspire them to action. When I was training for a 10k, last year, I had the race in mind every day. When I’m planning for a dinner party; it’s the same thing. Imagine success. Breath it. Embody it. Be it. Keep the end in mind and you cannot fail.

6. Yes. Try to say yes to things that support your goals. Someone asks you to be on the panel of a Success Panel; say Yes. Invites you to a Peer-to Peer group an hour’s drive away; say Yes. Asks you to teach a Leadership class; say Yes. As Hunter S. Thompson said “Half of life is just showing up”. It might be a hassle. It might even be scary. It might stretch your comfort zone. You can’t get there unless you say Yes .

I couldn’t have shown up this last year without an audience. I thank all of you; from those who have read one or two posts to my ardent weekly readers. I appreciate all the feedback whether from my local Rotary club or from the middle of the Pacific via cyberspace.

What do you need to be showing up for?

The Engagement Wizard

On April 9, 2013April 8, 2013 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace NavigatorLeave a comment

I think so many businesses, in today’s economy, figure employees “should be happy they have a job.” The truth is that, according to Inc. magazine, 70% of your employees are job hunting. They might smile and nod and laugh at your jokes, and at night they are on CareerBuilder and asking for recommendations on LinkedIn. Their resumes are up to date and they are ready to jump ship at the first sign of a decent paying job. They aren’t just looking for more money; they want a place that encourages engagement. As Dan Pink espouses in his book Drive, “autonomy, mastery and purpose” are the ingredients for the Engagement Wizard.

The Engagement Wizard is the secret to holding onto those employees who are phoning it in while they search for greener, autonomous pastures. It is far better to employ some engagement tactics to hold onto your veteran employees than to search out a perceived better fit. I realize that some folks are too far gone to turn around and they are the poison in the kool-aid. Employing a few tactics to create engagement for those who are salvageable, is well worth the effort when you figure that turnover can cost you anywhere from 50 to 200 % of the positions salary (and the replacements likely to cost you 10 to 20% more that the incumbent anyway).

So what are the techniques of the Engagement Wizard? Here are a few:

1. Thumb. Quit keeping your employees tightly under your thumb. It’s time to loosen the reigns. As Dan Pink said at a recent conference, no one ever said “my favorite boss was the guy who breathed down my neck”. People leave bosses. If you are dictating an employee’s every movement and deed and watching the clock to make sure they are constantly at the grind stone, your employee will not be engaged. Loosen up your thumbs.

2. Don’t prescribe. You should not view yourself as the doctor who is prescribing all the answers. As Liz Wiseman said in her book “Multipliers”, you want to shift from being the Tyrant who has all the answers to the Liberator who is listening. Listen; don’t talk. This encourages the autonomy that Dan Pink prescribes. If your employee is thinking for themselves, they are happier. If you don’t believe me, tell your partner how to make the bed. See how that goes over; and if they ever make the bed again. Don’t prescribe.

3. Learning. One of the downfalls in the recent economy is the slashing of training budgets. We keep the Sales and Marketing budget status quo, and cut the non-essential training and development budget. This, especially for Millennials, is a bad idea. Employees, who have a “Growth Mindset” as espoused by Carol Dweck, are constantly looking to learn new skills. “The Investor” as written by Liz Wiseman is the leader who is investing in resources for their team. Encourage learning so that your employees are gaining “Mastery”.

4. Monkeys. Delegate the monkey (as in task, project or duty) and check up on their care and feeding. Leaders need to delegate and give ownership to their team. This is another trait of Wiseman’s “The Investor”. You can’t develop Pink’s “Mastery” without letting go of the monkeys. This doesn’t mean you aren’t responsible for checking in on the monkeys, however you shouldn’t be the one filling the water dish. Delegate the monkeys.

5. Big Picture. Does your team know the big picture? Jon Gordon at a recent conference suggested handing out 3 X 5 cards to all your employees and asking what the purpose of the company was. What would your team answer? We all need to know the purpose of the organization for which we work. It is much easier to align with an organization and be engaged when we know what the purpose it. If you answer, “To make money”, your team is not engaged. Make sure they know the Big Picture.

6. Non-Commissioned Work. One of the best examples of how effective autonomy is to creating better outcomes was a study that Pink refers to in his book “Drive”. They found that in a blind evaluation (they didn’t know which art work was commissioned versus non-commissioned) paintings that were commissioned (i.e. I want it to match my couch, I want flamingos and it needs to be 6 feet wide) were of less quality and creativeness as opposed to non-commissioned work. So make sure your team has some time to just create instead of keeping them “in the box.” It’s not practical to have all non-commissioned work all the time, however some time left to one’s own devices is critical to engagement.

Once you’ve found your magic wand, get out of the way. You will be amazed at what folks can do if they are given the freedom to find their own path. Find your Engagement Wizard and start waving the magic wand.

Falling on the Sword

On April 2, 2013March 30, 2013 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace NavigatorLeave a comment

I was recently at a Peer-to-Peer Human Resource group at Elinvar in Raleigh, NC. They had an interesting speaker, Santo Costa, Esq., who spoke to the group about workplace integrity. The surprising observation he made was that integrity in an organization can be determined by how a manager handles mistakes. He brought up the example of General McChrystal stepping down after comments some of his staff made to a New York Times reporter and contrasted that with Janet Reno saying she was “taking full responsibility” for the Waco Siege but went back to her office and kept her job. I think any political example can be fraught with misinformation (press versus one party versus another party) but it does illustrate that the person who takes the bullet for his staff can dictate the culture of the organization.

In most organizations that I have worked in, if the leader isn’t willing to take the heat for his direct reports mistakes, there is inevitably a lack of trust. If the leader is constantly throwing their reports under the bus for every error and misstep, it will be a culture of CYA squared (covering your butt). If you want to build a culture of trust and integrity in work or your life, you’ll need to fall on the sword whether it’s for a direct report or your child or your spouse.

Here are some ideas on how to boost your integrity:

1. Consistent. Show up in your relationships in a consistent manner. The ability to control one’s emotions is a basic tenet of Emotion Intelligence. Being a hot head or moody, can put people in your life on edge. “Hmmm. I wonder if Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde is showing up for this budget meeting?” Working towards authenticity involves people’s expectations being met in that they can be confident that you won’t overreact or fall off the deep end. They know what to expect when you interact with them. Consistency is important to building trust.

2. Humility. Being humble in front of the team is important. No one likes working for the leader who is constantly tooting their own horn. The leader who does so is much less approachable. The humble leader makes sure their entire team gets credit for the project and makes sure the organization knows it. The humble leader is not trying to build their resume. They are building everyone else’s resume.

3. Rationale. Sharing the rationale with the folks around you builds integrity. If you are looking at new software to make the transaction process easier, make sure the folks that will be impacted by the new software, understand the rationale. There won’t be any buy-in if you don’t communicate the rationale. More likely, there will be dissent and mistrust and folks might try to thwart the process. Share the rationale.

4. Punches. Don’t pull punches. If there is bad news, craft the message and deliver it. Don’t drag your feet. Having information in limbo causes everyone to be in limbo. The gossip mill will certainly get a tidbit of information and turn it into catastrophic conclusions in the blink of an eye. Grab the tiger by the tail before it gets loose. Don’t pull punches.

5. Private. When someone makes a mistake, talk to them in private. Figure out what went wrong; maintain their self esteem and move on to some solutions. Don’t call someone on the carpet in front of the team. The best practice for a leader is to critique in private.

6. Public. When someone or the team gets something right, celebrate in public. It’s so important to identify milestones in a project or when you finally attain the millionth customer that you celebrate. Let everyone bath in the glory. They will seek more of it. Others will want to be on your team. Make sure you celebrate success in public.

7. Monkeys. Once you have delegated a monkey (a task or project), don’t take the monkey back. If you have assigned a monkey and the person has gotten off to a rocky start; don’t take the monkey back. You want to check in on the monkey (make sure it’s being fed and scratched), just don’t take it back. If people are unsure if they will keep the monkey they are much more likely to fail. Keep the monkeys where they belong.

Building trust and creating an authentic relationship is a long process. This cannot be created overnight. Take responsibility for those that work for and with you. There are times when you will need to fall on the sword but your team will be there to support you and you will create a culture of integrity.

Stress buster

On March 26, 2013March 21, 2013 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace Navigator5 Comments

I had the privilege of hearing Jon Gordon speak at a Capital Associated Industries conference recently. He is the author of several books but the one quote I took away from the lecture was “Be positive! You can’t be stressed and thankful at the same time.” How true is that! When was the last time you were stressed while praying or meditating? So when you’re running late for work; be thankful that you have a job and a car that’s working.

Jon Gordon’s recent book is “The Positive Dog”. It talks about how positivity in your relationships and at work will not only make it better for you but for those around you as well. Haven’t we all been there? You know who the Debbie Downers of the world are; and you try and stay clear of them. The guy who is constantly saying that the sky is falling? Yeah. Skip lunch with him. You’ll have a gun to your head if you hang out with him for too long. Positivity rules. And it is the ultimate stress buster.

Here are some tips on how to increase your positivity:

1. Stop. The minute you start catastrophizing some adverse event, you need to STOP. In Martin Seligman‘s book “Learned Optimism”, he recommends physically hitting the wall and saying “Stop!” If there isn’t a wall handy, try a rubber band on your wrist and snap it (hard) and say “Stop!” As Seligman says, this disrupts the thoughts. So if you are thinking your daughter was in a car accident because she is 10 minutes late, just smack yourself and say “Stop!”

2. Truth. As Byron Katie says in her book “Loving What Is”, is it the truth? If you are telling your self that your boss hates you, that your spouse doesn’t love you or that you’ve blown your diet; take a second look. Stuff a sock in your Inner Dictator, and ask yourself if it’s true. Dust off the evidence and analyze what you know to be absolutely true. What evidence do you have other than what your Inner Dictator has said? The boss is in the middle of an acquisition and is overwhelmed. Your spouse is working overtime and needs some appreciation. One brownie and a glass of Zinfandel is not blowing a diet. Make sure you know the truth.

3. Spill. Set the timer, grab a pen and spill your guts on paper. Dump all the worries, self-doubt and demons on some good old college ruled paper. This is amazingly freeing. Suddenly the stage of your prefrontal cortex is wide open, now that you have all the villains, bad actors and stage hands safely cleared off. Getting it all on paper and out of your head is such a relief. From there, light a match and literally “burn up your worries”. Spill your guts so you can look at the positive.

4. Blessings. Count your blessings. Inspiring coach Michele Woodward recommends counting three things you are thankful for before you get out of bed in the morning. Sometimes I cheat and count ten things I’m thankful for. Being grateful starts your day off with optimism. It might just be the roof over your head, your hardworking spouse and your dog (who is happy to see you no matter the circumstances…actually I’m usually the one that feeds her and she knows where her bread is buttered). An attitude of gratitude is an attraction magnet. Who would you rather hang out with, Sue Ann Nivens or Simon Cowell? I’m guessing the one who counts their blessings.

5. Discourse. Martin Seligman also recommends getting a close trusted friend and modeling the self talk in your head through some discourse. Your role is to take the positive angle and your trusted buddy takes your normal self talk of pessimism. So your buddy starts off with “You messed up that project and everyone is disgusted with you. You are so lazy”. You respond with, “It’s true I delivered the project late but the project itself was spot on. I know my boss was upset it was late, but he appreciated the quality of the project. I’m a hard worker. I was just a little overwhelmed and that caused me to be late.” The point is, that if you get good at arguing for you instead of against you (in your self talk), it will become second nature to stand up for yourself against your inner dictator. Grab a buddy and engage in discourse.

It’s amazing how much stress can be created by our inner dictator. Embracing optimism and positivity can have a huge impact on your ability to roll with the punches. The most important thing that Martin Seligman has found in his research is that you can learn to be optimistic. I hope a few of these techniques will help be a stress buster in your life.

Whooping all the Children

On March 19, 2013March 17, 2013 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace NavigatorLeave a comment

Unilateral punishment rarely is effective. In fact, I can’t think of a situation where it has ever been effective. I can remember threats from insecure teachers in elementary school, ”If no one owns up to the spit wad that just came sailing across the room, then everyone will stay after class, until someone comes forward.” It’s pretty difficult to back out of that threat. And if no one owns up or at least falls on the sword for the rest of the kids? Do the kids really think they’ll be stuck there until night fall? Perhaps someone will rat the culprit out; perhaps not. What are the kids learning from this situation? Punishment isn’t fair? Guilt by association? I need to be in a different class, preferably without spit wads?

Similar situations happen in the workplace all the time. One person has an odor problem? Let’s institute a policy about daily bathing. One employee misused the company credit card? No more company credit cards. One manager is way over budget? The “whooping” meeting. Invariably, the culprit walks out of the meeting oblivious to their transgressions and assumes “they must be talking about someone else”. The rest of the team slides into paranoia and figures “it must be me”. Unilateral punishment isn’t effective. Whooping all the children isn’t going to stop the hijinks.

Here are some tips on dealing with performance issues:

1. Exhale. As in, take a breath. I’ve seen meetings hurriedly thrown together while the boss is in a good lather. Not a good idea. Anger rarely results in proactive outcomes. You never know what you might say and whose feelings you will hurt (perhaps even innocent bystanders). Take some time and reflect on the situation. If you can feel your temples bulging and your heart racing, take a break…even a walk, and exhale.

2. Diagnose. What is really going on here? It’s time for some root cause analysis. Do we have a policy problem? Is everyone over budget or just two departments? If this is a systemic problem, it might be time to craft a new policy. If it’s just an offender or two, it’s time for a few one-on-one chats. Get to the bottom of the cause. If everyone stinks then Personal Hygiene Policy. If it’s just Joe that stinks, time for a Hygiene discussion with Joe. Diagnose the problem.

3. Blanket check. So if you decide that the issue needs a policy, make sure you have the right group covered by the blanket. Sending out the updated Company Travel Policy to the rank and file may cause confusion, (jealousy), and, eventually, over saturation of meaningless emails which are ignored. If there is a new software update for customer service folks, send out the update to the customer service folks who use the software. Sounds obvious, but isn’t your inbox full of information you don’t need? Make sure you’ve got the right blanket.

4. Test assumptions. So if you decide that it’s just Joe that stinks, check out your assumptions. Take a walk by Joe’s cube first thing in the morning. After lunch. After the budget meeting. Take a whiff. Is it a bathing problem or a deodorant problem or a cologne problem? You aren’t going to know unless you collect some observations. It might be that onion sandwich at lunch. Test your assumptions.

5. Message. Craft the message. Whether a policy or individual conversation. Decide what needs to said. Maintain self esteem. This is not the time to get out the hammer. Focus on facts and not emotions. Distill what you want to say down to two or three impactful sentences. If it’s a new policy, brevity and preciseness is key. Pass it by a second set of eyes or ears (someone without a dog in the fight) and then edit. This is not the time for a diatribe where the true message might get lost.

6. Deliver. Time to take the plunge and deliver the message. If it’s a policy, make sure to check step 3. Disseminate to those it clearly applies to. If you are constantly sending out messages that don’t relate to the person, you will eventually be ignored. If it’s a conversation with Stinky Joe? Make sure it’s private and check your timing. Monday morning? Bad idea. Month end? Bad idea. Wednesday afternoon after the company BBQ? Sounds good. Deliver the message with respect and empathy.

Most of the time when I’ve been present for a “Whooping all the Children” session, we’ve let things get down the road too far. We’ve avoided the conflict and waited until we are so uncomfortable that we need to lash out. Or we lash out at the wrong audience (i.e. we yell at the dog or lose our cool with our spouse). Try these steps to spare those relationships that are most important to you. Don’t whoop all the children.

Placing Trust

On March 12, 2013March 10, 2013 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace NavigatorLeave a comment

In today’s environment of identity theft, phishing, ponzi schemes and political corruption, it can be difficult to place your trust, well, in practically anyone or any organization. Just about every medium seems to have risks attached to it. I’ve been in the middle of a phone call with a medical office and when they ask for identifying information, I start thinking, “Did I call them or did they call me? How do I know this is Dr. Smith’s office?” When I got a flu shot this year, they would not give it to me unless I gave them my social security number. Really? What does my social security number have to do with a flu shot? Are they tracking my flu shot history and will this have an impact on my ability to collect social security someday? Doubtful but…

There is a slew of misinformation in this information saturated internet tangled world. We can Google evidence for any case we want to make. In “Republic, Lost” by Lawrence Lessig, the author makes the case that whether it’s the safety of Bisphenol A (BPA) or cell phone usage an argument can be made either way. In the case of BPA, it is a chemical that has been added to hard plastics like pacifiers and teething toys for over 40 years; there has been a slew of research on its safety. When Lessig dug a little deeper, he found that the studies that were backed by industry found BPA to be safe whereas those that were funded by non-profits and educational institutions, found evidence that it isn’t safe. The same held true for the safety of cell phones. Industry backed studies found no issues with radiation. Non-industry studies found a link. Doesn’t this affect the way you view information? Once there is money to be made, is the study unbiased? What source do you trust?

Here are some tips to evaluating sources:

1. Money. Follow the money. If someone or some entity can make a buck off your trust, be wary. My son has been offered “help” from various services to get college scholarships. Most came with a very steep price. He found the help for free. Follow the money.

2. Interest. Who has your best interest? Is there a profit or commission hidden in the small print? If it’s not obvious why someone wants to help you, do some investigating. I know that I verify charities on Charity Navigator (my favorite charity, Rotary International, is 4 star). If it’s not listed on that website, unless it’s a local charity where I know someone who is directly involved, I move on.

3. Ads. Investigate the claims made in ads. 4 out of 5 dentists choose *****. Who was behind that study? How did this product or that service get rated number 1. Do your homework on the promises made in ads.

4. Source. Consider the source. Is this your neighbor or co-worker who is recommending the new restaurant in town or is it some anonymous person on Yelp. Read many reviews before committing. It’s easy to have pseudo reviewers who are really the entire related family of the restaurant owners writing glowing reviews. Make sure you know the source.

5. Age. Know how old a review or study is that you find online. Nothing aggravates me more than when I can’t tell when a review was posted online. If there is no date anywhere on the review, be careful. I’ve made the mistake of going to a restaurant in a strange town only to find it had been closed for months. If there isn’t a recent review, especially on something as volatile as a restaurant, assume it is closed. Know how old the information is.

6. Openness. Double check the deal. I remember flying into Rio de Janeiro many years ago. Some very friendly folks met us as we got off the plane with some helpful tourist information and the indication that we must purchase the booklet. The information came with a price, $60. When we asked if we “had” to buy the information, we were told no. Don’t be pressured.

7. Gut. Frequently you just have to go with your gut. Many times over thinking something actually muddies the water. Too much information can become analysis paralysis. The kid on your front porch is selling “way too expensive” wrapping paper for his cub scouts; and you know that it’s the fund raising company that’s making all the money. Maybe you don’t buy the wrapping paper and just make a donation directly to the cause. Go with your gut.

I’m not an authority on which sources to trust or not in this world. But a little caution can help avoid some pitfalls. My son recently gave a homeless guy $20. He looked him in the eye and said “spend this on some food”. I don’t know where that guy went with that $20 but I can assure you that my son learned something from the experience. Placing trust can be difficult and uncertain.

Git ‘er done!

On March 5, 2013March 3, 2013 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace Navigator2 Comments

Have you ever –

Hemmed and hawed over a project?
Drug your feet on even starting?
Come up with 50 shoulda’s and kicked the can down the road?
And down the road a little more?

Your lizard brain has taken over your prefrontal cortex with fear of failure and all you can do is hang out on facebook for hours or watch one more show on the Food Network. Procrastination is gripping you and you can’t even see the first step, let alone the whole staircase.

I spent my Christmas vacation watching my son delay his college application process. He spent hours on “Call of Duty” instead writing college essays. This was a project he promised to start in August. And suddenly it was December 28th and most of the deadlines were January 1st. Now he was behind the eight ball and his sister and I (his editors) were not very empathetic. Now with the pressure of the looming deadline, he had to git ‘er done! He did get it done although it was painful for all of us. Care for some ideas on getting over procrastination and moving projects to completion?

Here are some tips:

1. Vacation. Zig Ziglar makes the case in his audio tapes called “How to Stay Motivated”, that we all seem to find time to get it all done on the day before vacation. This really hit home with me. Suddenly, you have your day scheduled out, know all your priorities, don’t waste a minute and are completely focused. So, if you really want to take action, imagine that you are going on vacation and plan accordingly.

2. Three. When the alarm goes off in the morning, plan three things you want to accomplish today. Just three. Not five. Not ten. Just three. (1) Go to the Y and work out. (2) Finish the financial aid submission. (3) Finish 3 annual reviews. There. You have your day planned out. As Stephen Covey would recommend, you have to schedule your “Big Rocks” (important non-urgent projects). In doing so, the “gravel” (unimportant distractions i.e. facebook, twitter) will fall by the wayside.

3. Timer. I do this for every blog post I write. I give myself 30 minutes to write. Anything. Just write. I don’t have to finish. I just need to write. After thirty minutes. I’m done. If I’m still inspired and on a roll, I keep going. If not? Go onto the next project. I find this to be the best cure for procrastination. It helps you side step perfection. It doesn’t matter if it’s perfect. You invested 30 minutes. And you can invest another 30 minutes tomorrow. At least you started. Set a timer.

4. Appointment. Many times we are collaborating with coworkers, team mates and bosses who are even better procrastinators than ourselves. They create squishy deadlines or vague goals. This can be like herding wet kittens. Make a firm follow up date. Make an appointment. It might get moved. But at least you are taking steps to keep the team or department on task. Make an appointment to follow up and stay on task.

5. Chunks. Big projects are really just a gathering of chunks. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Break the project into chunks. I can remember my daughter getting a book to study for the SAT’s. It was a very thick book. An overwhelming book. I suggested that she take twenty pages a day. We wrote on the calendar page numbers on each day. We chopped up the elephant. Chunks are much easier to digest.

6. Worst is first. In “Eat that Frog” by Brian Tracy, he recommends starting with the worst task first (ergo eat that frog). So if that happens to be exercise or reading an SAT prep book or writing annual reviews. Go for it. Forgo answering emails, chatting over coffee with your coworkers, or surfing pinterest. Get out your fork and knife, and eat that frog. The rest of the day will glide by with the worst of it behind you. Tackle the worst first.

Procrastination can be debilitating. Try just one or two of these suggestions. You’d be surprised how starting a habit or two can change what you can accomplish. Let’s reduce the frog and elephant population (no animals were harmed in this post) and git ‘er done!

Carrot or Stick?

On February 26, 2013February 24, 2013 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace NavigatorLeave a comment

How do we get people to fall in line? Is it best to use a carrot (incentive plan, appreciation or chocolate cake) or a stick (“you’re grounded”, late payment fees or speeding tickets). As Daniel Pink outlined in his book “Drive”, it can be a puzzling question. There is a study outlined in a book done by Dan Ariely where three different groups in India were given tasks to do in a same period of time but they were compensated at three different rates. The equivalent of $.50 (a day’s pay), $5 (two weeks pay), or $50 (five months pay). The group at $.50 and $5 were comparable in results but the $50 group underperformed! More compensation had the opposite affect. Those who receive the larger amount of incentive actually perform slower. This really doesn’t seem to make sense. Wouldn’t more money mean more output? Wouldn’t 5 months pay drive performance in an underdeveloped country? It didn’t.

I was in training at a “Telling Ain’t Training” workshop taught by Harold Stolovich. In one of the sections of the training, we all did a Boggle challenge with 16 letters to use to make as many 3 letter+ words as possible. On my page, it stated that “You have 3 minutes to make at least 20 words of 3 letters or more. People at your level usually obtain this result.” Half the group had this instruction, the other half did not have it. I was in the group that had the expectation that I would be able to make at least 20 words. My brain locked up! The expectation for performance shut my brain down. The group that didn’t have the expectation of 20 words out-performed my group. So how do we go about motivating people? How do we get them to perform in a maximum way?

Here are some tips to drive performance:

1. Simple. If the job is simple, the carrot will work. If it doesn’t take creativity, imagination or analysis, then use the carrot. I have a very weak stomach. If someone says their kid is throwing up at home, I immediately feel queasy. I inform you of this because once my beloved dog got sick in the middle of our living room. I went to my purse and took out a twenty dollar bill, gave it to my son and said “Take care of it.” Simple and straight forward. Telling him to clean it or be grounded, would not have worked. There are times when a carrot will work.

2. Pain. There are some things that require pain to drive performance. Pain generally will work if the result is immediate and is obvious. If there is going to be a painful result, such as a late fee, or loss of use of a cell phone (oh no!) and the person knows that will be the result of paying the bill late or staying out past midnight; it will drive performance. I implemented a wellness program some 4 years ago in which the penalty was up to $200 more per month additional for health insurance premiums. We had 100% participation. Most other wellness programs with a reward attached were considered successful with 30% participation. Pain works in the right situations.

3. Autonomy. Most of us want to decide for ourselves what we are going to do today. Micro managers who dictate every “dot of an i and cross of a t”, in the long run actually diminish performance. I can assure you that if I come in the house and tell my son to clean his room “right this instant”, I am not likely to have a great outcome. But, if I say, “I’d like your room cleaned. Can you get it done by 6PM when your grandparents arrive?” the outcome will likely be better. Now my son understands the rationale and is given the latitude to decide when and how he will get it done. Autonomy sparks performance.

4. Time Warp. I get my best work done early in the morning after I have mediated, eaten and exercised. My daughter gets her best work done in the afternoon and rarely is well rested. My son is a night owl. His peak performance could be from 8PM until 2 AM. Here is the problem. Many bosses, teachers and organizations want you to work a certain set of hours….or else! So what are we giving up in creativity and performance by shoe horning folks into certain hours. Find your (or your employee’s) best time warp.

There is a time and place for all carrots, sticks and autonomy. They all don’t work for all situations. If you want to drive the best performance, you might want to try out a few of these ideas to see if you can move the needle on performance.

Listen up

On February 19, 2013February 18, 2013 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace NavigatorLeave a comment

I recently read Daniel Pink‘s book “To Sell is Human.” His premise is that everyone is selling; that we are all trying to move people. So teachers are trying to get students to do their homework. Doctors are trying to get people to take their medicine. We are all trying to move someone to do something. The most interesting chapter was on improvising and a company called “Performance of a Lifetime” created by Cathy Salit. In this class executives are taught how to improvise which involves an intense amount of listening. If you think about it, we can’t improvise without listening. We can’t move people without listening. We can’t sell without listening.

My son and I share a love of listening to stories. One of the things I look forward to on a long car trip with him is that he is always game to listen to Story Corps, Radio Lab or The Moth podcasts. These are all documentary type radio shows where people share their stories. They can be deeply personal, a guy recounting how he met his fiancé who later died in 9-11, or a story about how some people see more colors than others (could it be me?) or mad cap drug induced adventures in Morocco. The thing is, if you aren’t good at listening, you will miss the meaning of the story. And it takes practice.

So what could you be missing? Here are some tips into how to improve your listening skills:

1. Pause. Daniel Pink and Michael Segovia, an outstanding MBTI instructor, both recommend that you pause. Dan Pink recommends 5 seconds and Michael recommends 10 seconds. In Michael’s case, every time he asks a group of participants if they have any questions, he would count to 10 in his head. This seems like an eternity. But for those people who prefer introversion, they need that time to reflect. Dan, on the other hand, pauses at the end of someone else talking. It lets you reflect on what they said. Pause, digest and truly listen.

2. Eye to eye. If you are physically in the room with someone, make eye contact. Hold their gaze when they are talking. Be in the moment. If they are on the phone, cut all the technology. Don’t be reading emails, texts, messages, Facebook updates or playing Soduko. Imagine them being in front of you and making eye contact. Can’t you always tell when you are speaking to someone over the phone and they are distracted? We all can. Tune in and turn off the clatter!

3. Understand. Stephen Covey said “Seek first to understand and not to respond.” If you’re busy planning your response (re: argument, counter point, brilliant repartee) you are not listening. Ask questions that help you understand their point of view. “What do you think your boss meant by that comment?” “How is your relationship with your Mother?” “I can see you feel hurt, what do you want to do about it?” Do a deep dive into their story. Don’t give advice. Just seek to understand.

4. Mirror. In one of the exercises that Dan Pink did in Cathy Salit’s class was to mirror someone else’s movements. Now this type of mimicry would be over the top in real life, and cause a fist fight between my brothers and I when we were kids in the back seat of our Country Squire station wagon. But subtly copying someone else’s stance can create some symbiosis. They lean back in the chair, you lean back. They lean in, you lean in. This creates a sense of connection. Mirror others to build confidence.

5. Generosity. Listening is about being generous. Selfless. As a great facilitator from Inscape Publishing once said “It’s all about them.” As in your audience. It’s time to hang up your one-ups-manship. Your friend is talking about their trip to Hawaii? There’s no point in butting in to talk about your honeymoon in Maui. Your co-worker just finished a year long project? Now is not the time for a diatribe on the messy project you are in the middle of that just got delayed….again. Your spouse had a horrible day yesterday? Now is not the time to bring up the Honey Do List. Give them the gift of being the center of your attention. Completely with no strings attached. Be generous.

6. Yes, and. One of the exercises from Cathy Salit’s workshop is something I have experience in one of my classes while earning my Masters. In the class, we had to plan a fictitious class reunion. First, we were instructed to say “Yes, but.” When that played out, the energy in the room diminished. None of the ideas had any traction. Everyone was a wet blanket suffocating inspiration. In the next round, we were instructed to say “Yes, and.” One word changed, and we all had possibilities. We were intently listening to everyone’s ideas and building on them. Next thing you know we were holding the reunion in Rio with limos, samba lessons and caipirinhas. Try it. It’s inspiring.

Listening is a way to be present and take in the person, loved one or group interaction around you. It can be a gift to yourself and others to just show up and “be there”. One of the most effective ways to do that is to LISTEN.

Hold ’em or fold ’em

On February 12, 2013February 11, 2013 By Cathy NoiceIn Workplace NavigatorLeave a comment

One of the most difficult decisions in life can be when to give up and throw in the towel. Taking the step to cut your losses – whether it’s a relationship, a job or terminating that employee who just isn’t turning around – is a painful arduous decision. Frequently, it feels like you are the failure. “If I was just a little more patient…hard working…helpful…compassionate….fill in the blank.” Some of us carry the burden of someone else’s failure.

It can be a tricky decision to know when to cut the ties. As Kenny sings, “Know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em.” Perhaps it is always a gamble. Maybe the person you are leaving really is “the one”. Maybe this next job isn’t the dream job. Maybe that employee can turn a new leaf. There are no crystal balls. There is only the decision.

So how to you determine if it’s time to cut your losses?

Here are some ideas:

1. Time. Put a little time between you and the incident or the, “Why don’t you sleep on that?” syndrome. Your boss blew up at you. Your partner embarrassed you in front of some friends. The employee just pulled a knucklehead move and everyone is talking about it at the water cooler. This is not the time to make a decision. Your blood pressure is up, that vein is bulging at the side of your temple and your lizard brain (that isn’t very rational) is in full control of your brain.

Give yourself a time out.

2. Distance. Put some distance between you and the incident. I’m not suggesting an impromptu trip to Paris (although it would be fun). Leave the office and take a walk in a local park. Leave the spousal argument and go to the movies. Take a mental health day and go get a pedicure/haircut/facial/whateveryouwant. Stewing in the same house, office or classroom as the object of your ire is not going to help you get perspective.

Get some distance. Literally.

3. Write. Dump all your concerns on a page. Don’t edit. Just dump. If you need some ideas, read a great book by Mark Levy called “Accidental Genius“. He recommends “free writing” to work out problems, coming up with new perspectives and just enhancing creativity. One of his ideas is to have a conversation (on paper) with someone else. So explain your situation to Gandhi, Abraham Lincoln, or Helen Keller. Take both perspectives (yours and your historical figure) as you “talk out” the situation. You might get done and figure out that Helen told you to appreciate what you have and go back to work. Gandhi might tell you to move on. You don’t know what you might come up with until you start writing.

So write.

4. Third Party. Get a third party. BFF. Marriage Counselor. Career Coach. Your Dad. Talk to someone outside of the situation. Find someone unbiased. Your best friend at work isn’t likely to be unbiased about the boss. Your Dad won’t be unbiased about your spouse. But if you switch them up, you might have an un-jaded perspective. I find that the insights of others can be enlightening. It’s a great way to test your assumptions and to clarify motives.

Get perspective.

5. Decide. Are you in or are you out? Make the decision. Whatever you decide, make the commitment. If you are in, then you are All In. Don’t decide that you hate your job and then stay; retiring but still showing up for work. Give it your all. You can’t stay on the fence. That’s not fair to anyone. If you decide to stay with your partner, then stay with all your heart. If you decide to fire the knucklehead; then do it with grace and dignity.

And move on. Decide, commit and have not regrets.

This process can be painful. These are crucial decisions. Hopefully, these are rare events in your life, they have been in mine. But hanging out on the fence can be even more painful to everyone involved. It’s time to decide – hold ‘em, fold ‘em – there is no in between.